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In the examples that follow, formulate an initial response to the anger and criticism you hear

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In the examples that follow, formulate an initial response to the anger and criticism you hear. Then construct your answer, looking at the steps for disarming anger, and use those steps that seem appropriate. The four steps are: (1) thank the person for the comments, (2) ask for more information, (3) find some point on which you can agree, and (4) begin to look for a negotiated solution. Please respond to each of these with typed responses.

1) A man is coming to your agency for assistance after release from a drug rehabilitation center. He wants you to do more for him than you think is wise. You have been very helpful in ways you could, but you have also insisted he do some things for himself because you do not want him to become dependent. He is frustrated, and one day when you suggest to him that he try to call his lawyer himself, he blows up and yells, “This crazy place, sucking up the taxpayers’ money—and for what? I get so sick and tired of your trying to make me do everything when that’s what you’re paid for. A bunch of idiots is what you are! Incompetents! Sure, I can do it myself! If I wanted to do it myself, I wouldn’t have come to you, would I?” What is your initial response?

2) A woman who is in your shelter feels neglected. Twice you are interrupted when you are talking to her because of severe emergencies. You apologize both times and continue your discussion with her, but you are short-staffed and things at the agency are unpredictable. The second time this happens, when you can get back to her, she cannot remember what she had been saying. That upsets her. She says, “You all sure can find plenty of reasons to avoid talking to me. Every time I sit down to talk about my case, you get up and run off. Now I can’t remember where we were. I don’t see you running off when you talk to Alice or Cindy. Just seems like every time I need help, well, you have something more important to do.” What is your initial response?

3) Do you see differences between the issues the man is having with the agency and the issues the woman is having with the agency? Are you and your agency more to blame in one instance than in the other? How does your response differ as a result?